Commitment? Check. Commitment? Check. Commitment? Boom!

Oh how hard it is to escape the vicious cycle of insecurity in relationships.

Wanting to peg someone down too quickly to see whether they're 'committed' is like trying to insist cabin crew serve you their delicious vacuum-packed fare during take off. Give it a chance!

Telling someone you love them on the first date, planning your retirement together, or talking about 'us' and 'we' prematurely applies too much pressure and saps the spontaneity and fun from the early stages.

Having to 'know how they feel' may be fair enough down the line, but asking them too soon where they see this relationship going can make them feel like they're being interrogated in a job interview.

What to do: Hold off for a while until you know each other better. Everything that exists in our Universe, as far as I know, has a time scale - including love. Don't be too quick to establish yourselves as a longstanding couple when you've known each other just a few weeks.

To your relationship bliss,

#Mark Tyrell (my senior relationship coach expert) shares #Mikolinton cares

Is desperation for certainty ruining your relationship?

You know MICHAEL, I think overcoming relationship insecurity is partly about becoming less controlling. This may sound strange, but feeling that: 'This relationship must be exactly as I think it should be!' is a form of over-control. A sign of insecurity in relationships is when the desire for certainty becomes too strong.

Having to know whether your partner really loves you, having to know this or having to know that puts a lot of unnecessary strain and tension into the relationship. The fact is, we all have to live with uncertainty.

Insecure people can still feel insecure even when they are told they are loved. Wanting what is not possible (complete and utter certainty in all and everything forever) is not possible because imagination can still make up doubts. So stop looking for certainty where it doesn't apply.

Self-assurance comes from starting to relax with uncertainty. Wanting to know for certain that someone will be with you forever prevents you enjoying the here and now. Nothing in life is certain.

To your relationship bliss,

#Mark Tyrell (my senior relationship coach expert) shares #Mikolinton cares

Is the past controlling your relationship's present?

MICHAEL he said, have you ever taken an instant disliking/liking to someone merely because they reminded you of someone else who you disliked/liked?

Some people do this with whole relationships.

Because they were in a relationship with someone who was abusive, very critical or dishonest, or who left them, they respond to a new partner defensively or angrily when, in fact, the new partner is not really like the old one at all.

If you suspect you have been making faulty unfair comparisons between your current partner and a former one, then write a list of all the destructive traits of your former partner.

Write next to this list all the ways your current partner is different and review this list regularly. This will help you to stop assuming that the future has to be like the past.



To your relationship bliss,

#Mark Tyrell (my senior relationship coach expert) shares #Mikolinton cares

Is the past controlling your relationship's present?

MICHAEL he said, have you ever taken an instant disliking/liking to someone merely because they reminded you of someone else who you disliked/liked?

Some people do this with whole relationships.

Because they were in a relationship with someone who was abusive, very critical or dishonest, or who left them, they respond to a new partner defensively or angrily when, in fact, the new partner is not really like the old one at all.

If you suspect you have been making faulty unfair comparisons between your current partner and a former one, then write a list of all the destructive traits of your former partner.

Write next to this list all the ways your current partner is different and review this list regularly. This will help you to stop assuming that the future has to be like the past.


To your relationship bliss,

#Mark Tyrell (my senior relationship coach expert) shares #Mikolinton cares